A Soldiers Blog

Support Group Helps Soldiers' Families
Associated Press
January 27, 2004


EVANSVILLE, Ind. - Rusty Bitzer came into the Indiana Army National Guard Armory with a stack of photographs his son had sent from a war zone.

One shows his son arm wrestling an Iraqi man. Another shows a fellow soldier with blood on his arm - not from an injury, but an IV used to rehydrate in the desert heat.

Bitzer, 47, smiles as he shows the snapshots to other parents, spouses, girlfriends and children of deployed Indiana Army National Guardsmen. At parades, parties and meetings like this one, families of the 66 deployed Evansville Guardsmen from the 1st Battalion, 163rd Field Artillery gather with those who understand, exchanging pictures and news out of Iraq.

Like other family readiness groups that crop up around many Guard and reserve units, the Evansville members share their fears, and sometimes frustrations, about a war that took their loved ones away nearly a year ago.

Few families knew each other before the meetings, but they now talk about paying bills, discuss soldiers whereabouts, wait for a date for the soldiers to return and worry about how they will adjust when they do.

Family support group meetings and events like picture exchanges aren't something Bitzer thought much about until his 21-year-old son got the call to go to Iraq last February and left a few days later.

But Bitzer said early on he and his wife knew they needed help. The group is an outlet for information and support. "It's somebody else just like you," Bitzer said. "There's a bond."

The group sends care packages to soldiers, as well as birthday and Christmas cards with prepaid calling cards. The group's leader, Rita Cassin, sends e-mail updates with information about the unit and the status of injured soldiers.

Although the oldest member is in his 50s, most of the men in the Evansville unit are single and in their early 20s. Some got married days before leaving for Iraq.

Deborah Heldt, 41, a tire saleswoman and vice chairwoman of the Evansville family readiness group, said she tries to listen to the wives.

"Emotionally, some are lonely not having the guys around," said Heldt, whose 19-year-old son was deployed with the unit. "We let them cry. In my world, crying is my relief. Some of them girls get embarrassed about crying. I say it just shows you have a heart."

She said she's also comforted parents, some who are confused and angry about how their son ended up fighting in a war.

I say to parents, "Don't worry, my son's watching your son's back and yours is protecting my son's back," Heldt said.